Glücklich Verkopft, 9 Aug 2025 — in English

Two months after my mom passed away—and just two days after the death of her father—Nora and I recorded an episode for her podcast. We shared a deeply personal conversation about relating to our parents in their final stages of life.

I spoke about cuddling my mom in a hospital bed, having my hand on her chest to feel her final heartbeat, and the alternative way we arranged her farewell ceremony. It was a period filled with disbelief and grief—but also: with so much beauty.

It feels strange to share about this publicly. Nora also hesitated to make an episode on this subject. But we realized that most people will face the loss of their parents one day. And just as hearing others’ stories has inspired us to show up in ways that left us grateful and proud, we hope that sharing our stories might offer something meaningful to those who need it.

Listen to the episode:

• Via the website
• On Spotify

It switches to English after a minute, and we start talking about this specific topic 14 minutes in. I hope it can help you or someone you know.

Lovalution, 1 Jul 2025

In deze aflevering gaan we in gesprek met schrijver en ervaringsonderzoeker Mette Koppelaar, over wat het betekent om echt aanwezig te zijn.

Waarom is het zó moeilijk om echt jezelf te zijn? Wat maakt dat we blijven hangen in verhalen over wie we denken te moeten zijn? En hoe kun je oefenen in aanwezig zijn - ook (of misschien wel juist) als het ongemakkelijk wordt?

Samen onderzoeken we hoe liefde, eerlijkheid en kwetsbaarheid pas echt tot leven komen als we stoppen met performen en gewoon durven zijn.

Luister naar de aflevering:

• Via Spotify

With Kris Shapran, 2 Apr 2025

A 1-hour Instagram Live conversation about authentic sexuality, joy, weirdness, and the pleasure of breathing.

• Short snippet
• Full conversation

Related offerings:

• Rebirthing the Sensual Self (22–26 April 2026, Berlin)

This was the first theory block of weekend 1 of Ambassadors For Humanity 2025/26
(Friday evening, 31 Oct 2025).

In this talk, I explain how my Pyramid of Permission model forms the foundation for this weekend and the course as a whole. It introduces how we various parts of the pyramid can help you create safety and permission within yourself.

If you’re unfamiliar with the Pyramid of Permission, then maybe start by watching this video about the pyramid in more detail.

This was the second theory block of weekend 1 of Ambassadors For Humanity 2025/26
(Saturday morning, 1 Nov 2025).

In this talk, I introduce Nervous System Awareness as a way to increase your sense of inner safety. I start by explaining Polyvagal Theory (based on the work of Stephen Porges, Deb Dana, and Mariëlle Spronck) and then offer an alternative to letting the stress responses in your nervous system subconsciously run your life.

This was the third theory block of weekend 1 of Ambassadors For Humanity 2025/26
(Saturday afternoon, 1 Nov 2025).

In this talk, I discuss how reactive behaviors can turn into coping mechanisms, and how seeing yourself as a collection of parts (as explained by methodologies like Internal Family Systems / IFS) can help you welcome all of yourself.

This was the fourth theory block of weekend 1 of Ambassadors For Humanity 2025/26
(Sunday afternoon, 2 Nov 2025).

In this final talk of the weekend, I offer some thoughts on how to start integrating the weekend's teachings into everyday life. I also offer some counter-perspectives to the various models and ideas, as a way to be less dogmatic and more open to using your experience to discover what works for you.

The model and philosophy that forms the foundation for most of my work:

Skip to what interests you:

• 00:00:00 — Three levels of humanity
• 00:02:42 — Real Moments
• 00:04:15 — Creating real moments
• 00:06:42 — Safety and permission
• 00:09:00 — The full model
• 00:10:20 — Creating positive imprints
• 00:12:36 — Supportive environments
• 00:14:50 — Confidence, skill & sensitivity
• 00:18:22 — 5 weekends, 5 perspectives
• 00:24:36 — Group conversation

An introduction on how your circumstances, past, and inner state shape whether or not you can “be yourself” in any given moment. Learn how you can start embracing all of yourself, feel more at home in your body, and more at ease in life:

Skip to what interests you:

• 00:00:00 — Introducing the first two weekends
• 00:02:13 — Your personal domain
• 00:04:20 — The Pyramid of Permission
• 00:05:09 — How safety shapes your experience
• 00:08:17 — How permission filters your expression
• 00:09:41 — Real Moments
• 00:10:18 — The “authentic self” myth (and the alternative)
• 00:14:09 — Safe & free within yourself (how to achieve this)
• 00:17:06 — Group conversation
• 00:21:08 — Outro

How do you create freedom & safety within relationships? How can you use nervous system awareness to avoid drama? How do you create a relationship that welcomes and empowers the individuals and their differences? Watch the video:

Skip to what interests you:

• 00:00:00 — From individual to relational
• 00:00:59 — Cultivating safety & freedom in connection
• 00:07:19 — The drama triangle (meets the nervous system)
• 00:16:12 — Safe states of the nervous system
• 00:18:52 — Empowering relationships
• 00:23:50 — Group conversation & outro

In these times of war, polarization, systemic oppression, and even Western/democratic governments limiting freedom of speech, everyone can play a role in preserving what makes us human. One side of this is political activism: supporting specific causes or groups. The other side is seeing beyond our differences and staying open to love. Here’s a video where I talk about this in more detail: