The Path of Real Moments:
a 10-week course on authentic self-expression as a path to loving life.
On Thursday evenings from 5 Feb to 10 April 2024 near Hasenheide in Berlin. (Week 1 is on a Wednesday.)

Dates: Thursday evenings from 5 Feb until 10 Apr 2025 (except week 1, which is on a Wednesday). The exact dates can be found below the title for each week in this box. Times, address, and more details are in the next box.

Course structure
The course follows the three-part structure of Mette’s book. You're invited to read Part One online before we start. It explores how our conditioning and social environments can prevent us from creating real moments, and introduces the approach we'll use for tackling those challenges throughout the course. The remaining two parts of the book are covered in the course directly. We'll take five weeks for each part.

First half: Outer Expression
After creating a supportive container for exploration, we start with the basics: creating real moments by honoring your inner truth. You get to practice noticing, welcoming, and expressing specific aspects of your experience while staying attuned to those around you. You can play with navigating situations from one second to the next, and develop skills and courage to face a wide range of situations.

• Week 1: Honor your Thoughts
  Wed 5 Feb 2025
  We'll invite you to explore various ways of speaking your mind while staying attuned to others, and to communicate openly as a way to connect with others and get to know yourself.
• Week 2: Honor your Emotions
  Thu 13 Feb 2025
  This week is about emotions: releasing, regulation, and communication. You can explore when each of these approaches are helpful, and can gain some experience with each of them.
• Week 3: Honor your Desires
  Thu 20 Feb 2025
  You can focus on recognizing, welcoming, and expressing our boundaries and desires. Playing with various ways of knowing and communicating what you want, you can learn to stay in connection with people, even when they don't want the same things.
• Week 4: Honor your Body
  Thu 27 Feb 2025. At a different venue.
  This week is all about the body: responding to your physical needs, expressing yourself through movement and appearance, and having physical interactions that feel true to the moment.
• Week 5: Integration
  Thu 6 Mar 2025
  A week for integration and revisiting key topics, before we shift to the next phase of the course.

Second half: Outer Expression
In the second half, you can focus on questioning your inner truth as a way to understand your experience more deeply. Rather than assuming your thoughts, emotions, and desires to be “true,” we’ll use experimentation and self-reflection to uncover how your past conditioning shapes your experience in the here and now. Together with honoring, this approach contributes to more freedom and flexibility in the present moment.

• Week 6: Question your Body
  Thu 13 Mar 2025
  We invite you to question your relationship with your body, by exploring how expectations and cultural conditioning have shaped your beliefs about your body, physical needs, and the way you physically interact with others.
• Week 7: Question your Desires
  Thu 20 Mar 2025
  You’ll get to challenge your desires. We invite you to distinguish between genuine desires and coping mechanisms; to question which of our goals and wants have been shaped by societal expectations; and to find empathy for the desires of others that challenge you.
• Week 8: Question your Emotions
  Thu 27 Mar 2025
  Explore how your emotional responses to specific situations are shaped by your conditioning and previous experiences. You can deepen your emotional honoring practice by taking ownership for your emotional responses. You’ll learn to recognize unhealthy emotions, and can try to transform them into their healthy equivalents.
• Week 9: Question your Thoughts
  Thu 3 Apr 2025
  Here, you can challenge your perception of self, others, and the world around you. You get to explore how your culture, upbringing, and conditioning shape your judgments, beliefs, and perception of the world. As you connect with the subjectivity of the way you experience the world, you may find more openness to the views of others.
• Week 10: Final integration
  Thu 10 Apr 2025
  Our closing session will focus on integrating our journey and closing the container together.

Registration: sign up now or join the Telegram channel.
(There are still free spots.)

Calendar: Add all dates to your calendar (downloads a .ics file)

Dates: Thursdays from 5 Feb until 10 Apr 2025 (except week 1, which is on a Wednesday). The exact dates of each week can be found in the box above.

Calendar: Add all dates to your calendar (downloads a .ics file)

Time: Arrive between 18:00 and 18:45. We close the doors around 18:45 and open them once more after the opening—usually around 19:15. We finish at 22:30.

Where: Wamos. Hasenheide 9, 10965, Berlin (Google Maps). Week 4 is at a different venue.

Price: Scroll down to the 'Price & inclusivity'

Group size: up to 30 people.

Language: Guidance in English. Practices can be done in any language (depending on who you do them with).

Bring: comfortable, layered clothing, a water bottle, and snacks to share—and whatever brings you comfort or joy.

Preparation: You're invited to read part 1 of Mette’s book, which you'll receive for free.

Dinner: Feel free to bring your dinner and eat it in the space.

Pets: You can't bring your super cute doggie. We're sorry.

Nudity/sexuality: This course is mostly clothed, but there's optional nudity in some weeks. The course is non-sexual.

Accessibility: The venue has an elevator, but there are some steps to reach it. We’re happy to help out. Please get in touch if you require any assistance.

Mental health: If you’re unsure if you can hold yourself in this space, for example due to trauma, mental health, or being overwhelmed in bigger groups of people, please let us know in the form. Mette will reach out to decide together whether this is the right time to join.

Telegram channel: @mettekoppelaar

Registration: sign up now or join the Telegram channel.
(There are still free spots.)

Cancellation policy: Scroll down to the 'Cancellation policy' box.

We believe that attracting a diverse group makes this a richer experience for everyone, so we’re committed to welcoming people in different financial situations. At the same time, meeting in person costs more than meeting online, running a high quality course takes lots of time and effort, and we need an income to sustain ourselves. We offer this course at various price points, and we ask you to choose the option that matches your reality:

• Be a helper: €0 - €100
  Join the room setup team. Preference for those who need it most. Only 3 spots.
  
• Receive support: €250 - €425
  Be supported by those who have financial means to share.
  Option to pay in 2-3 installments. Includes 19% Mwst.
• Pay for yourself: €450
  This price lets us offer this to you in a sustainable way.
  Option to pay in 2-3 installments. Includes 19% Mwst.
• Offer support: €475 - €999
  Pay for yourself and support someone who otherwise couldn't afford to join.
  Includes 19% Mwst.

In the application form, you can suggest the amount that matches your circumstances. Please consider that rather than requesting a lower price, you can also request to pay in installments. Priority for helper and supported spots is given to those facing challenging situations or coming from marginalized backgrounds and identities. Unsure what to choose? Feel free to message Mette on Telegram for some guidance.

Registration: sign up now or join the Telegram channel.
(There are still free spots.)

Cancellation policy:

Mette Koppelaar (he/they)

Mette looks for authentic expression in playful and meaningful ways. As a writer and facilitator, he loves to play with identity, normalize emotions, expand self-expression, and build connection by exploring both our uniqueness and shared humanity. He's drawn to exploring the edges of comfortable discomfort, and discover together what’s on the other side.

His desire to dress outside the gender norm sparked a deep interest in what it means to live authentically. He organized multiple editions of (the currently inactive) Nibana Festival as well as various workshops and retreats which serve as playgrounds to explore authentic expression. In 2020 he started writing a book about this very topic, which is still on of his main projects.

Mette was born in Amsterdam in 1984. He’s racialized as white, able-bodied, and comes from a middle-class background. He’s gender nonconforming and uses he or they pronouns. While this bio might sound pretty serious—especially when he writes about himself in the third person—he likes to think that he hasn’t lost his sense of humor.

Photos: Ilse Wolf, Bartjan de Bruijn, Moritz Schachner.

Ella Shields (they/them)

Ella is a consent educator, intimacy activist and, well, general activist. They see consent as a decolonial ideology that is the foundational antithesis of capitalist values - turning competition into collaboration, endless burning of resources into rest and checking in with your capacities, and perfectionism into messy humans acting irrationally. Ella mainly engages with conflict and accountability processes and how to turn that into deeper connection and intimacy within your community. They find that so many activist groups tend to fall apart over time because we are unintentionally perpetuating the very systems we're trying to move away from. Their humor allows for playful engagement with heavy topics while always holding space for the depth of emotions.

Silvia Laporta (she/her)

Silvia is a Berlin-based versatile holistic body worker as well as a gong and soundscapes performer. Her work shines light on the intriguing connection between sounds, cognitive experiences and the subtle energies that shape our state of mind. Silvia’s sound landscapes journey to a wide spectrum of oneiric experimental waves of sounds produced by therapeutic & shamanic instruments as Tibetan bowls, gong, ocean drums, koshis, chimes, bells & voice. By inducing a deep meditative state this ‘psychedelic like’ experience evokes multidimensional aspect of subconscious, and beyond, a travel through time and space to meet the self. Silvia offers 1:1 treatments, group sessions & art performances in Berlin and the rest of Europe.

Below is the answer to the question whether people would recommend this course as well as the testimonials that people left after the 2023 edition. While the testimonials are overwhemlingly positive, I'd like to say that I'm far from perfect. I always ask partipiants (and team members) for feedback. I don't publish the feedback but I do use it to improve my facilitation.

★★★★★ "Mette has a calm presence that feels very intuitive, flowy and fun. They are very present when holding space. They created an incredibly well designed workshop that is inspiring, challenging and thought provoking. I loved being with the group that was created during the workshop, it felt like a little family."
- Marlene

★★★★★ "Doing this workshop series with Mette was really supportive for me during a difficult life transition. The weekly workshops gave me a space to connect to myself and others. They gave me the space to get more in touch with different parts of me. In the workshops I could explore new ways to communicate and bring those parts that I usually keep in hiding in contact with the people of the group. Mette and his team created a container in which I felt safe to explore and also safe not to. I appreciate the way in which he draws tools from different approaches, and offers them unobtrusively for everyone to pick what is helpful for them."
- Mia S.

★★★★★ "Dear Mette, thank you lots for the series of workshops. I started to feel some changes during the first session already. Now, a month later - I am happy to observe cool shifts and somewhat something like kinda … true me? no self judgment and overthinking, intuition leading to unexpected events, living life and not postponing it… I like it) . I don’t know what exactly did this, I do know that for the whole five weeks - every Thursday I committed to the participation in „Authentic self“. I thank you for the safe space, guidance, and organization. I wish you much success (also as the author of a book!)"
- Olga

★★★★★ "I really enjoyed the workshop. The team created a safe and cozy environment, where it felt natural to be more open and authentic. The 2nd month in particular happened to be a wonderful experience for me, it connected a lot of thoughts and tools that I knew and brought them into active use. I started catching myself using some techniques on random situations much more, which is absolutely great! So thank you so much for the workshop!"

★★★★★ "I looked forward to attending Mette’s RA workshops almost as if it were a weekly meeting that will always bring me closer to my center, a form of modern communal meditation on the things that matters to humans to come into alignment. It helped me review my values & wishes, incorporate new practices, adjust some behaviors and perceptions, and even rekindle some beautiful friendships of yore in a new light and approach that supports the maintenance and growth of these new tools and knowledge. Mette’s and the participants, it all became consistently inspiring! I was deeply reminded to invite more intentional play time in my life!"
- BeLL

★★★★★ "The workshop was super intensive, I was able to reflect on myself again and again. I would describe myself as a people pleaser who finds it difficult to set boundaries and communicate my own needs. Through the various exercises, however, I was able to learn how valuable saying no can be. The positive environment and positive group structure made practicing so much easier and I have continued to develop. So if you are interested in authenticity and genuineness and want to learn what consent means and how to communicate this in a friendly way, I can only recommend the workshop. Thank you, Mette, for your being, you are an absolute enrichment and we all need a bit of Mette in us."
- Franzi Redeker

★★★★★ "These days I wake up feeling grounded, happy and excited about the day ahead of me. I attribute this emotional well-being to the brilliant workshop series I experienced. Mette, the facilitator guided us through a sequence of exercises to connect the inner and outer world. The sophisticated emotional release tools and empowerment exercises deserve a special call out. I felt great at all times throughout this workshop journey as the facilitator created a safe and entertaining space for me to thrive in my authentic self. It was beautiful to witness how everyone looked and felt more alive after the sessions."

★★★★★ "I love how Mette combines theory and practice in the workshops. How to explore your own authenticity without feeling your feelings or experiencing your body? And how to understand authenticity without taking the mind along the path of exploration? I could really sense that Mette has studied the human being on all three levels (& beyond) and integrates that in the workshop. That is/was truly special for me and helped me explore my authenticity in a holistic way. Mette's work goes deep. Definitely recommended."
- Teresa

★★★★★ "Mette has a special power to create a safe container where everyone can feel welcome and most of all safe to explore who they are. The workshop consisted of a mixture of meditation, theory input and practical parts to feel, connect and explore. Mette managed to combine theories in an impressive way so they would complement and enrich each other. The practical tasks were amazing and wonderful and also really different in each session. It was a space where you could fully feel and explore who you really are and that allowed yourself to be seen and feel accepted with what for me was one of the most wonderful aspects. The workshops felt like a secret hidden place in nature, warm, sunny, safe, to feel relaxed and free and thereby creating excitement and curiosity to explore. It was great to be with people who share the same values and to feel the connection based on a level of acceptance and freedom that arises if you participate in a space like this.
The workshops encouraged me to speak up for myself more, to be more aware of my values and to live them more honestly in daily life. I also had really important insights about myself and relationships in my life and I am still curious how these insights will develop further. Also just having a reserved time during the week to be aware of who I am, how I feel, dress or behave if I am really honest with myself was an energy that spread through the whole week. I also really liked to reflect more about what I am more curious about and I am excited for what is there yet to come. For the start I finally got a short haircut and a nose piercing ;)
I truly believe that if more people would participate in spaces like this and work like this is spread throughout societies we can change the world we want to live in."
- Nora

★★★★★ "Mette's workshop was a beautiful space, wonderfully balancing the self and the society / group. The line between self-care and selfishness was properly nuanced and not crossed, making it all the more comfortable to dive into our authentic selves and relate to others in a healthy(er) way. The exercises were not just helpful, but fun, yet 'difficult/ enough to challenge ingrained behaviors and patterns.
I'm sometimes a bit skeptical of any more esoteric ideas, but the workshop did not trigger this in me at all - it felt well-grounded and sensible, which is something I noticed early on in Mette and very much appreciate about his approach.
I have already been telling my friends about 'this cool workshop I took part in,' and have been recommending them to do it as well."
- Lucia

★★★★★ "I joined the workshop in a very challenging and transitioning/changing period of my life.
The workshop helped me to get in touch with my emotions and learn how to stay there with them even when it doesn't feel pleasant. It helped me to understand better what I want, to make steps forward into learning how to say no without overstepping others' boundaries. It helped me to listen to the reasons behind my yes and my no, to feel myself and what I want.
The whole experience changed me, I feel more able to see other people needs, while respecting my own needs and boundaries. I'm more able to feel my own emotions and stay with them without finding a way to suppress them. The workshop took a big part in my personal growth process. I'm really thankful for the opportunity to be part of it."
- Francesca

★★★★★ "Mette created a space where I felt very safe and comfortable. I learned something valuable in every workshop, which was only possible because of the skillful connection of theory and practice. All of it was very well done and Mette has a gift to make ideas easy to understand.
Rejecting people, expressing emotions or mentioning tension in a relationship; those are all really challenging social skills. Many of us are socialized to just swallow our thoughts and feelings even though it can damage our integrity and relationships.
The workshops Mette created gave me the tools to practice expressing myself more authentically, especially in challenging situations. I think they have the potential to greatly improve the communication in any relationship.
What really made it all stick was the weekly schedule. The regularity of the sessions kept authenticity and the skills I was learning on my mind so I could use and practice them in my daily life and I really felt the impact. I feel a lot more able and confident to express difficult thoughts and emotions.
I'm really grateful and glad I could join the radical authenticity workshops and I hope more people will get the chance, too."
- Manu Korb

★★★★★ "Mette's workshops came in a very weird and transformative period of my life. They were recommended by a blogger Natasha Kuzmina in her blog, and Natasha was telling very nice things about Mette as a facilitator. So I decided I needed to try, my soul was asking for it. I was feeling rather unsure, lost, hollow before the start of the workshops. But during the workshop time, every Thursday, I would comfortably and gently open new sides of me to myself. I would tell my therapist every Sunday during our session about what we did on RadAuthenticity and she would beam with joy for me, because it weaved so nicely into our therapy process, too.
During one of the exercises/practices in a course I felt a strong connection to my masculine self, the side that before was there, but I kept aggressively ignoring it and telling myself: "Nah, you're just imagining things, you should be like everyone else, it's not the time to think about it". But now I am very actively figuring out (with my therapist and psychiatrist) what my gender and my gender expression are. Finally, I feel a power inside of me to accept that I am different, I am colorful and bright, and it is okay. Because so many people in our workshop group would just accept me as I am, my pronouns and my truths. It felt liberating.
There were parts where I felt uncomfortable, because that's how I felt through the exercise - all the emotions, memories, conflicting feelings inside of me. This uncomfortableness, though, would also teach me things about myself and my truths. I cried a couple of times, too. It was a big deal for me, because before I felt a strong fear and shame of crying in public, of showing big negative emotions in front of other people. I felt free to give in to my emotions here, though. The space we would make every Thursday felt safe, warm, inviting, and so creative. I am an artist, so creativity and authenticity is very much important to me in a professional way, not just in a self-love-journey way.
Now I feel much free in expressing myself through my art, through performance. It is easier to be on the stage, being seen in my most sensitive and soul-opening moments, being perceived. Where I was feeling constrained and nervous before, now, after Mette's Radical Authenticity workshops, I feel a free-flow. I even use some meditation and breathing practices in my teaching work as a singing teacher and a choir conductor. It helps me to connect to my students on a deeper level, and also to be more accepting of their truths. They also love it - it helps them to be more present and mindful during their lessons.
Most importantly, I now feel on a very deep level how different we are, and how beautiful it is. We all have our challenges, our desires, our inner images of how we want to present ourselves, how we want to be.
It is a little sad that this beautiful series of workshops has ended. I quite enjoyed it, because every Thursday we would have something new to think about. The program was carefully curated and felt natural and interesting to go through. Especially, I am very grateful that Mette didn't push us to do the homework. It is a challenge for me, and it felt really nice that not doing homework was also a respected option.
Mette was very democratic with how much money he would ask for our contribution. In the beginning of the first month, I was in an extremely tight financial situation, but I really really wanted to go to at least one of the meetings. It was so important for me as an act of self-love. Mette was very kind to invite me despite everything and not ask for a financial contribution, just a symbolic little contribution. It really supported me in so many ways. I felt I could have a place too, despite my financial situation, I was a part of it like everyone else. I am very grateful, it was a big thing for me! <3

★★★★★ "I'm very happy to have taken part in this workshop organized by Mette. On a personal level, it allowed me a lot of liberation. I was able to put out of me things that had been kept inside. I'd never tried this kind of exercise before and had no idea of its liberating power. I didn't even realize how many layers there were to some of these things, to the point where I'd forgotten that there was something here, and there... This workshop allowed me to reveal to myself a new layer of my persona/ego that I was considering until then to be myself.
In my quest for meaning, I found myself drawn to the point of view Mette wanted to share about "human being and how he lives his truth". Having said that, I initially had a bit of trouble with the title of the workshop and the word "radical" it contained. Radical to me resonates with "extreme". And in my opinion, when you go to extremes, you run the risk of forgetting other people's truths. That's why when I visit extremes, it's always with the aim of extracting an essence of truth and bringing it back with me to the center, to be confused with those of other horizons I've visited.
But I was very pleased to see that during the worksop, this idea of getting back to the center was actually very important. And it's one of the foundations of the workshop that I think gave it its greatest efficiency and strength.
This was made possible by:
- introducing each workshop with a guided meditation to focus our attention on our emotional center
- the systematic invitation to return to our inner self for a few breaths after each externalization exercise
- this regular reminder to keep our attention permanently 70% inside and 30% outside.
I'd like to thank Mette for this sharing, as his point of view was very interesting and has indeed enriched mine, I can only say so once I've returned to my center.
Many thanks 🙏"
- Christelle André

Wonderful! We still have spots available, so fill out application form and share your motivation for joining. We'll message you on Telegram within 24 hours.

Sweet. Isn’t it great to know what you don’t want?

Maybe you want to join the Telegram channel and be the first to know about other events, or check out Mette’s book?

I feel you. It can be a difficult choice. Perhaps I can help you out a little.

Here are some common doubts that people share with me:

• "I'm excited but also a little afraid"
• "I don't have much experience in these spaces (and I fear that I'll be the only inexperienced one)"
• "I don't know anyone else who's going (and I fear that many people already know each other)"

Many people have these kinds of concerns before signing up. In a way, some level of fear or hesitation can indicate that it's the right time to join. It shows that you've found an edge and that the course can lead to growth. So when this is you, I suggest to take a leap of faith and join us.

Here are some other common doubts:

• "I have many things going on and I fear that adding this might be too much"
• "I'm afraid that I'll never have a chance to do it again"
• "I'm really low on cash and spending money on this would make life complicated for me"

If these sentences describe your situation then this might not be the best time to join. If you have mental capacity but lack the money, then you could fill out the application form and ask to be a helper or request a discount. Make sure to explain your circumstances as well as your motivation for joining. If you don't have capacity, but FOMO is getting the best of you, then maybe start by closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. Yes, right now. This may not be the right time for you to join. There will be more chances to work on yourself. You can join the Telegram channel to know about future events or trust that the right thing will come your way when you feel more spacious.

If you're still not sure..

If you have unanswered questions after reading everything, feel free to get in touch on Telegram or through the contact form. Alternatively, here’s a quick video of me explaining a simple practice to help you decide what you want in an embodied way:

The following values are the foundation for this event. If these don't resonate with you, then we may not be a match. Of course, these values are always a work in progress. If something about them doesn’t feel right, or if you have ideas for improvement, we would love to hear from you. Message Mette on Telegram or through the contact form. If it ever feels like the facilitator(s) don't live up to these values, we welcome you to tell us.

1. Authenticity: Everyone's invited to verbally, physically, and emotionally express themselves. We can play with our expression without justifying ourselves, yet we strive to do so in a way that’s considerate of other people.

2. Inclusivity: We welcome all identities and personal backgrounds. We try to notice the judgments and assumptions we make about others, and question racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, or other discriminatory beliefs or behavior.

3. Consent: We respect each other's space, stuff, boundaries and privacy. We share a responsibility to create a safe environment for ourselves as well as for others.

4. Confidentiality: We don’t share about other people’s experiences. We don’t comment on other people’s experiences without their consent.

5. Self and group responsibility: We try to be aware of the ways in which we take up space and strive to contribute to the safety of the group. We’re all responsible for our own physical and emotional needs.

6. No sex or romance with team members: Team members don't share arousal, sexual energy, or romance with participants.

If the course is full and someone fills your spot:

• 100% refund minus €75

If the course is not full or no one fills your spot:

• Cancel up to 2 months before we start: 100% refund minus €75
• Cancel up to 1 calendar month before we start: 50% refund
• Cancel up to 2 weeks before we start: 20% refund
• Cancel in the 13 days before we start: no refund

* Your spot is considered 'filled' when the spots of others who cancelled before you have been filled up first.

Not all experiences in these kinds of spaces are pleasant – no matter how much we try to do things right.

If you have an unpleasant experience with a team member or fellow participant, we encourage you to contact them directly. Alternatively, you're very welcome to reach out to Mette on Telegram or through the contact form or to any other team member. We may be able to support you and won’t take any action without your consent.

If you have an unpleasant experience with Mette, you may reach out to Mette, to another team member, or to Mette's accountability partner Anouk Bongers. She won't communicate with Mette unless you consent to it. You can find her contact details here.

One more thing: It may take time to process certain experiences. Sometimes months or years. The offer above remains valid. There’s no such thing as reaching out too late.