Duality of Desire 2024:
Express your wants with ease. Free yourself from craving.
21+22 Sept, 10h-18h. Small group, flexible pricing. Holographic Healing Next, Kreuzberg, Berlin.
This weekend will happen again in 2025.
Right now, you can join The Path of Real Moments from Feb to April 2025 (in Berlin) or join the Telegram channel.
★★★★★ "I love how Mette combines theory and practice in the workshops."
★★★★★ "I learned to speak up for myself more, to be more aware of my values, and to live them more honestly in daily life."
★★★★★ "A container in which I felt safe to explore and also safe not to"
How do we find satisfaction? Through getting what we want? Or by learning to be content with what is? By pursuing our desires, or by making peace with the present moment? Is satisfaction the result of doing, or of accepting?
In this weekend workshop, we’ll explore two seemingly opposing paths to navigating our desires. One path involves honoring our desires. We'll practice noticing, welcoming, and expressing our wants, and we'll work on our skills to get exactly what we want. The other path involves questioning the stories that drive our desires. We'll practice seeing things from different perspectives, and cultivate a mindset that's less attached to the outcome of our actions.
In an intimate group of 10-15 people, we’ll play with different ways of engaging with the present moment. Some exercises will be verbal. Others include touch. Sharing our insights and challenges along the way, we’ll move with the group’s evolving needs.
If you join, you're encouraged to read the first few chapters of Mette's book (which you'll receive digitally after signing up). This will help us establish a shared foundation for our exploration.
This weekend will happen again in 2025.
Right now, you can join The Path of Real Moments from Feb to April 2025 (in Berlin) or join the Telegram channel.
More info
Dates: Sat/Sun 21+22 Sept 2024, 10h-18h.
Arrive between 09:30 and 09:45.
Where: Holographic Healing Nest.
Eisenbahnstraße 11, 10997, Berlin (Google Maps)
Costs: Scroll down to the next box (Price & payment)
Group size: up to 12 people.
Language: English
Preparation: you're encouraged to read the first few chapters of Mette's book (which you'll receive digitally after signing up). This will help us establish a shared foundation for our exploration.
Bring: comfortable, layered clothing that makes you feel good, a water bottle, pen and paper, your own lunch, and snacks to share.
Optionally bring: anything that sparks your creativity, playfulness or connection, like clothes to dress up in, instruments, or things to play with. And anything that brings your comfort, like your favorite seating pillow or an eye mask.
Food: There will be a break to go out for food or to have your own food. Unfortunately there are no cooking facilities or fridge.
Pets: You can't bring your super cute doggie. I'm sorry.
Nudity/sexuality: We may do some touch practices, but sexuality and nudity are not the focus of this course. If it comes up in the group, we might do something that involves nudity, but we'd only do that if it feels right and beneficial for everyone.
Accessibility: The venue has a set of stairs and no barrier-free toilet, yet we’re happy to help out. Please reach out if you have specific needs.
Mental health: If you’re unsure if you can hold yourself during this workshop, for example due to trauma or mental health challenges, please fill this out in the form. Mette will reach out to you, so we can decide whether this is the right time to join.
Telegram channel: @mettekoppelaar
Price: You pay €75 at registration to cover the running costs of this weekend. This includes taxes and access to the book. Afterwards, you donate €1 or more for the facilitation, based on your financial situation and what the weekend has brought you.
Inclusive pricing: I, Mette, believe that everyone benefits from diversity in the room, and I aim to exclude as little people as possible. The minimum donation is €1 to avoid forgetting it, but the choice is fully yours. I trust that the *average* donation will make things work for me. So, please, still join if your budget is low. If you can’t afford the basic signup fee, but feel a strong calling to join, message Mette on Telegram or through the contact form and we'll see what's possible.
Bank details
Name: S.R. Koppelaar
IBAN: DE16370190001010516718
BIC: BUNQDE82XXX
Paypal
You have to MANUALLY switch the transfer type from 'Goods and services' to 'Friends and family' RIGHT BEFORE you confirm, or Paypal takes a service fee, which I'll then ask you to pay.
Account: [email protected]
Or click here.
Mette Koppelaar’s desire to dress outside the gender norm sparked a deep interest in what it means to live authentically. He's writing a book about this topic, organized multiple editions of (the currently inactive) Nibana Festival, and hosts workshops, courses, and retreats which serve as playgrounds to explore authentic expression.
Mette was born in Amsterdam in 1984. He’s racialized as white, able-bodied, and comes from a middle-class background. He’s gender nonconforming and uses 'he' or 'they' pronouns. While this bio might sound pretty serious—especially when he writes about himself in the third person—he likes to think he hasn’t lost his sense of humor.
First photo: Ilse Wolf. Second photo: Bartjan de Bruijn.
Values & Accountability
The following values are the foundation for this workshop. If these don't resonate with you, then we may not be a match.
Of course, these values are always a work in progress. If something about these values doesn’t feel right or if you have ideas for improvement, we would love to hear from you. Message Mette on Telegram or through the contact form.
If it ever feels like the facilitator(s) don't live up to these values, we welcome you to tell us.
Authenticity: Everyone's invited to verbally, physically, and emotionally express themselves. We can play with our expression without justifying ourselves, yet we strive to do so in a way that’s considerate of other people.
Inclusivity: We welcome all identities and personal backgrounds. We try to notice the judgments and assumptions we make about others, and question racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, or other discriminatory beliefs or behavior.
Consent: We respect each other's space, stuff, boundaries and privacy. We share a responsibility to create a safe environment for ourselves as well as for others.
Confidentiality: We don’t share about other people’s experiences. We don’t comment on other people’s experiences without their consent.
Self and group responsibility: We try to be aware of the ways in which we take up space and strive to contribute to the safety of the group. We’re all responsible for our own physical and emotional needs.
No intimacy with team members: Team members don't share arousal, sexual energy, or romance with participants.
Not all experiences in these kinds of spaces are pleasant. Sometimes, stuff goes wrong.
If you have an unpleasant experience with a fellow participant or with a team member, we encourage you to contact them directly. Alternatively, you're very welcome to reach out to Mette on Telegram or through the contact form or to any other team member. We may be able to support you and won’t take any action without your consent.
If you have an unpleasant experience with Mette, you may reach out to me directly, to another team member, or to my accountability partner Anouk Bongers. Anouk won't communicate with me unless you consent to it. You can find her contact details here.
It may take time to process certain experiences. Sometimes months or years. The offer above remains valid. There’s no such thing as reaching out too late.
You made it to the end. To stay in the loop, join the Telegram channel. Want none of that? Here's a random fact that continues to blow my mind.